Finally, Sree and I got married on Feb 1st in Chennai. After years of courting, we are husband and wife now.
The wedding went great and so many people showed up. It was a typical brahmin wedding. We didn't expect so many people. It was exciting as well as scary.
Viratham:
January 31 2009
We started from our house to the wedding hall (Geetha Bhavan) around 5.30 AM. My brother (Kanna) helped us unload the luggage and left for the train station to bring the grooms's family.
I was ready and just waiting for the groom to arrive. Since we had to fast till the function was over, I could not have my breakfast. Same with my parents. I had a glass of milk and had to survive on that till around 12.30.
Finally Sree's family came to the mandapam. How did I know..? The mela vadhyam started. My relatives who were there for the morning were all there to receive him. He was greeted with an arathi by my aunts (athai and mami).
These 2 days, Sree got princely treatment from my family. He got his feet washed with milk, garlanded a hundred times. I told him to enjoy as much as he can..... cause he is not going to be treated this way ever again.
I was still waiting in my room behind the mandapam. I was not allowed see the groom now. :-( For these 2 days, I had to act like a "kalyana ponnu" (as a typical bride).
I was getting hungry. I woke up by 3.30 in the morning. I wanted to eat a breakfast bar before any one caught me. But my cousin Anu was against it. She snatched it from my hand. What does she know. Wait till her wedding gets fixed. Before her viratham starts, I am going to have my breakfast in front of her.
Sree's family gets ready and come down. They are ready to start the viratham. Only then do I get called. Finally. I was about to go to sleep.
Our viratham started too. I smiled at him, but he had a serious look on his face. I had a feeling he was going to run away that night.
After a couple of hours of homam, it was done and we were ready or some pictures and then food at last.
The photographer Raghu wanted a lot of our solo shots. He realized he cannot many the next day.
Sree and I were asked to come to a room. Ofcourse, before the wedding, I am not supposed to be with the groom alone. My aunts, Jaishree mami and Indira chithi, came along with me. I was so tired. You can see it in my face. I had no energy to wear any make up. No make up!!!!!!... Gosh. What was I thinking???? I just washed my face and went there.
Sree's shoot was already going on.
After some time my cousins (Anu, Mahesh, Karthik and Roopa) came along since my aunts had to go down.
Poor Sree. Had a tough time with all of them ragging him. None of his cousins were in the room. After some time, the shoot was getting awkward. He had his arms around me, we were asked to hold hands, etc. I am glad the elders saw these photos after we were married ;-)
Nichyathartham (Engagement):
I didn't really get any sleep after the photo shoot. Had to change rooms in between (Kanna and my cousins did most of the work). Before I knew it, I had to get ready.
My cousin Rekha's mother in law (Kamala Mami) came to help me with the hair. She did an amazing work. She made it look very simple.
Sree had to go to the temple first with his family and my family. They did an archana and got back to the mandapam. How did I know when he came back. The mela vadhyam people started their work.
I knew I had to get ready soon.
In the mean time, Sree got his next dress.
Mami had a tough time to tie my saree. This was given by my in-laws for the engagement. It was a beautiful silk saree - full of zari and in my favorite color maroon. But it was heavy too. But Mami did a great job in making the saree stay on me till I collected my next dress.
I went to the hall and collected my next saree.
I changed into my next saree and by that time Sree was ready in his sherwani. I have to say. He did look good (OK. Don't tell him.this). Our families then exchanged thamboolam and the priest conducts the nichyathartham. This was for less than an hour. Then it was time for more phots (lots of them!) - another photo shoot followed by photos with friends and families.
By the time we had dinner it was around 10.30.
I could go back to my room after midnight. Just before I was about to go to sleep, I called Sree and made sure he wasn't gonna run away. I knew he was tensed. It was almost 2.00 AM when I went to sleep. I had a loooooong day ahead of me.
My last day as a single gal just got over.
Was I ready to start a new life? The life that I knew so far just got over and I was about to start a new chapter. I will not be my parents kid anymore. I will not be their responsibility any more. I was going to become somebody's wife. No more childish behaviors. Time to get matured.
Will I be ready???
The wedding:
February 1 2009. 3.45 AM. wakey wakey...
Never been so tired in my life. Kamala Mami helped me get dressed and did my hair again. When it was almost 6.00 AM I had to go with my family to Sree's suite to bring him to the mandapam.
My mom had to apply kajal in Sree's eyes. This is to keep the evil eye away. I gave my mom a kajal pencil and asked her to apply very light. But his mom and his aunts did not approve of it. They got a proper 'mai' dabba and made my mom apply. She did a good job.. But he looked funny since then.
Sree was about to have his breakfast. They asked me to stand next to him. He is going to get angry with me for saying this.... He scratched my leg. He made sure nobody else saw ( we think). I almost yelled. Can't believe the photographer caught this moment. It was then I knew he was not going to run away!
Kasi Yathra:
After his breakfast, I went to my room get ready. My hair was still not done.
Sree left for his Kasi yathra (to take up brahmacharyam or bachelorhood for life) with the book and umbrella. They went outside the wedding hall and my dad brought him back. My dad told him he will give his daughter in marriage.
I think Kasi Yathra is the funniest tradition we follow. Literally just a couple of hours before the wedding, the guy 'decides' to take bachelorhood. Then he comes in and gets married. I think this is our equivalent of 'Does anyone have objection to these 2 people marrying'. I guess if the guy does not like the girl he is about to marry, he can just keep running. If the bride or her family does not like the groom, they need not call the guy back.
Anyways, Sree has decided that he will marry me and comes inside the hall.
Oonjal:
Then, I was called to come downstairs.
First we exchange garlands.Both the groom and the bride must be lifted by their respective Mamas (mom's brother) and we have to make it difficult for the other person to garland.
I have a tall Uncle (Ganesh mama) and he lifted me with ease. Unfortunately, Sree is tall and heavy. His uncle could not lift him as high as I was in the air. I had no trouble garlanding him.
Then Oonjal time. (Bride's side). My relatives wash our feet with milk, walk around us with the lamp and throw the colored rice in all directions.
Then time to go inside. All this time, the priest asked Sree not to leave my hand. Oh.. the joys of being a bride. It was funny.. since for the first time, We could hold hands in front of hundreds of relatives!
Kanya daan:
By this time, I was actually enjoying my wedding. No major problems that I knew of (Amazing isn't it??). My job was just to sit and pose. My cousins' job was to take as many snaps of the wedding as possible and they did a good job. There were so many snaps our official photographers missed and the guys caught those moments.
Sree had work to do.. He had to repeat all the mantras the priest was saying. He later scolded me for posing too much. Well.. its the bride's day and not the groom's. I took hours to get dressed. If I don't have good photos of my wedding, I am going to be annoyed.
Then my dad gave me away (kanya daan) to Sree telling him that I am his responsibility from now on. Unofficially we are married at this stage.
Then I got my madu saar - the next saree I had to change into. It was already 8.30 by this and our muhurtham was from 7.30 to 9.00 AM. I was so sure we were going to miss the time.
Sree's athai paati and his other relatives came and helped tie the saree. I was out by 8.45. In the confusion, I still managed to pose for the photographer.
The wedding - the moment
I went and sat down and the priest said a few things for just a couple of minutes and then Sree tied the thalis. We made it - just in the nick of time. In Sree's custom, they tie 2 different thalis - one set for each side and only when tying them to the gold chain do they combine them.
I started to cry. This is it. I am not a kid anymore. I am married. I belong to Sree now. I just kept crying. Donno why. Sree didn't understand why I was crying.
and then some more rituals.
One main thing was us taking the 7 steps together. Sree takes my feet with his palm and walks me till the ammi.
Then we had the small nalangu where we play games - we roll coconuts and flower balls.
Oonjal:
Next we had the groom's side Oonjal. The guys at the wedding hall actually dismantled the oonjal! so we did it without the swing. It was still fun.
By now, we were tired and hungry. You could see it in our faces.
Grihapravesham:
Kummi:
Next we went down and their family members said we have to do the kummi. Um.. excuse me.. I am not doing that.
We didn't have a choice. Sree and I were pulled in since we were the main characters and we did the kummi. well.. I just clapped this side and that side. I can't believe the video guy has taped it too. Finally they let us go and have lunch.
For the "first time" we sat next to each other and ate. I was crying again for this. Till then, I was sitting with 'my' family - with my cousins and now suddenly I was not. It made me realize what just happened.
Nalangu:
At the end of the day, I was just relieved everything went well. I was ready to go to sleep. But there was soooooo much packing to do. I can't believe how much stuff I had for just 2 days.. but 2 most important days of my life.
Thank you for reading this!
